Monday 28 October 2024

Bizarre Criminal Connections

What makes a criminal? You may think the answer is "the doing of crime", but that's the boring, pedestrian answer. I'm talking about the strange connections you wouldn't have expected. I'm not talking about how all arsonists like watching things burn, or all cat-owners are sociopaths, I'm talking about connections you wouldn't expect. Like, did you know that being bottle-fed when you're very young makes you more likely to be left-handed? Or, have you heard that having light-coloured eyes, such as blue or green, is linked to higher pain tolerance?  What about how chewing gum during a task has been associated with an improvement in memory?
There are all kinds of strange connections out there, and they're not all as innocent as hair colour and a good vocabulary. Today, I want to share several of these strange connections that have been found between criminals.

[Editor's Note: For the sake of intellectual honesty, I feel the need to tell you that this is not the first time that I was planning on writing a piece like this for the Halloween Countdown. However, after doing a lot of research into "strange things that make people become criminals", I chose not to post it because just before writing the piece, I found multiple sources that disputed what I'd found. This post rather than claiming "this thing causes you to be a criminal" is about "weird connections several criminals have", but those sources that dispute all this research are many and varied. I tried to replace the most egregious inaccuracies, so I could write it for today's post... but the stuff I found to replace it was often just as disputed. Unfortunately, as time is of the essence, I find myself with little else I can post today, so I will go ahead with it, but with this disclaimer: a lot of the information within this article is heavily disputed, so please keep in mind that criminality is not defined by any one characteristic, correlation is not causation & most importantly, this is for entertainment purposes and not intended as legal or moral advice. I have found links between all of these things, but they're a lot more tenuous than you (or I) would have hoped.]
So, next time you see a criminal, and are wondering just what makes someone like them want to commit a terrible crime, you might be surprised to learn...

5. Flashers are Bad in Bed
This may just sound like an insult, and I'm sure that there are some exhibitionists out there who take offense to the statement (and as long as you're only engaging in exhibitionism with fellow, consenting adults, then I do apologize). But, there has been a clear connection drawn between having a dysfunctioning penis, and a desire to waggle it at people. And I say penis, because yes, it does tend to be men. Not just because women are less likely to be flashers, but because women with sexual dysfunction are much less likely to expose themselves. The reason this is so low on the list is because, well, of all the connections it's the most straightforward - people that are sexually odd, do odd sexual things - it seems pretty clear. But, nonetheless, I want to explain the theory behind it.
Theory: See, the connection between the two is actually twofold. Firstly, men who have erectile dysfunction, or are premature ejaculators, tend to be sexually frustrated (as do their partners), and frustration, shame and embarrassment are associated with impulsive, risky behaviours such as flashing, and so there's a clear connection there. But, also, if someone is sexually aroused by the idea of exposing themselves to a non-consenting stranger, to the point that they will be motivated to do it, then there is a high likelihood that they will find regular sexual intercourse less enjoyable as it doesn't cater to that fetish, meaning they'll be both less enthusiastic and less physiologically "aroused" in every sense of the word, meaning they usually won't be very good at it.

4. Arsonists tend to be Late
I'm sure that if you're too busy burning down a building to get to work on time, you're going to get there late, but this connection is much more than simply "burning stuff can take up your valuable time". The idea here is that the psychology behind arson is related to the mind of someone who tends to be late for school. Of course, it's not true of all arsonists... those who burn stuff down for revenge, to burn evidence, or in an attempt to commit tax fraud, their psychology is a bit different. I'm referring mostly to the pyromaniac, the person who enjoys setting things on fire.
Theory: This is one of my favourite connections, but it's also admittedly the most tenuous (which is why it's the first item on this list) but there are studies that prove it. Firstly, there's the idea of chronotype, the idea of being a "morning person" or an "evening person" isn't just a cultural phenomenon, some science has shown that people have an innate body clock that is more suited to early morning or late evening. Those studies also show a correlation between evening people, people who prefer to stay up late and sleep in, and risky behaviours. Now, being up late at night may be more related to insomnia than chronotype; but insomnia is closely related to (and may be comorbid with) anxiety which, guess what, is also closely related to pyromania. Also, being late to school may have more to do with a dislike of school, than sleeping in, that's fair enough... but once again, guess what else is related to arson? that's right, childhood delinquency, and poor school performance. No matter how you slice it, it seems as though people who like setting fires just aren't good at showing up on time.

3. Spree Killers are Failures
This one also just sounds like an insult, and I'm pretty sure that anyone that kills another person isn't necessarily a great guy (and I say guy because 80% of spree killers are men), but I mean failure not as an insult but as in someone who has failed. Spree killers tend to have an unsuccessful life, in particular they tend to be bad at school and have poor social skills (if not being outright antisocial), and especially right before they commit their horrific act they usually fail at something significant. They will lose their job, their partner/spouse will leave them, or maybe someone significant to them will die.
Theory: The reasoning given for this is that a spree killer feels like they don't matter, or that their life isn't significant, because of their failings in early life and their lacking social skills mean they don't have any kind of significant friend network to fall back on. Most importantly, they don't value the life of themselves, because they've failed to maintain friendships, and thus lack the necessary empathy for the lives of others. There's a lot here in regard to mental health, spree killers are often victims of abuse and bullying. So, when they lose that one thing, a friend, a job, a reason to live, they feel powerless and isolated, and thus see a massacre as a way of regaining a sense of self and feeling powerful. After all, any massacre affects dozens of people directly, but hundreds and thousands indirectly. In the mind of the spree killer, this is a kind of power, they usually (but not always) target the people whom they feel took their life from them. Basically, spree killers feel like they need a 'win', and for some sick reason, they see the massacring of several people as a kind of success.

2. Muggers are more likely to have Hayfever
This is the exact kind of thing I was looking for, and when I first heard about it, it sounded ridiculous. but, it seems to be true. If you have an allergy, especially seasonal allergies like hayfever, you're more likely to be a criminal. I thought this was crazy, but there are multiple sources that show that on days that have a higher pollen count, violent crime is measurably lowered. Some studies I read even suggested that this was such a strong predicter, policing could be reduced on those days with no ill effect. But, if all violent crime (including domestic violence) tends to go down, why do I associate this with muggers and thieves? According to pharmacists, the most commonly stolen items tend to be allergy and hayfever medications.
Theory: This one is fascinating, and it's all there in the data, but what isn't is why. The leading theory is that allergies are a financial burden, that puts people under undue stress that can lead to socioeconomic disparity (one of the causes of criminal behaviour). And severe allergies can affect schooling, yet another predictor of criminal behaviour, poor education. Of course, some researchers believe that it's simply a fact that 20% of people tend to have seasonal allergies, and so it may be that cutting the number of people on the street by a fifth gives criminals less victims... I'd argue that doesn't make sense, as less people sounds like less witnesses, since muggers and thieves tend to target one person at a time. And as for stealing drugs from pharmacies... well, it's all about infrequency. Pollen counts and sudden flare-ups of allergies can be unpredictable, meaning it's a sudden, unexpected financial burden to be paying for allergy medication.

1. Serial Killers Wet the Bed
This is one of the weird ones. There are some clear and logical connections for serial killers. Serial killers tend to commit animal cruelty as children, they tend to be poorly educated and they tend to be male, all of that is pretty well understood. But, the one factor that stands out is bed-wetting, especially late into their adolescence (i.e. past the age of seven). Obviously, if any kid is struggling with their toilet training, they deserve care and attention and you shouldn't be concerned that they're a young killer in the making, bed-wetting alone doesn't make one a killer. However, bed-wetting late in their childhood is considered an indicator that puts someone at risk of being a sociopath, and becoming a serial killer.
Theory: It's known as the MacDonald Triad, it is a set of three factors during one's adolescence which could be a predictor of violence into adulthood. Those factors are fire-setting, animal abuse and bed-wetting. If a child has any two of these factors, they're considered a potential risk, but if they have all three it's thought to be a possible predictor. MacDonald simply based this on studies of existing serial killers and violent criminals, and found these conditions retrospectively, but later studies (when they don't dispute the findings) theorize that late-childhood bedwetting can be an indicator is significant childhood stress, which can be caused by abuse or parental neglect. If a child hasn't been abused, it can be a sign of poor neurological development, but both of those are associated with serial killers. So, whilst there are some clear connections between bed-wetting and serial killers. I don't want anyone freaking out that their child's soggy sheets means they're a killer in the making, but it is a fascinating connection that even psychiatrists have used when looking into serial killers.

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So, that's my list. As I said in the editor's note and disclaimer, please remember that these are correlations, not causations, and that they're not incontrovertible facts. They're just odd connections that I found and wanted to share. What's most disappointing is that some of the most unusual ones I found turned out to be complete bunkum [the connection between sexual inadequacy and killing the president, whilst interesting, turned out to be true only in a minority of cases, and possibly spread as propaganda, but it did lead me to learning about flashers, so there's that], but thankfully the ones in this list aren't so easily dismissed (even though they're all definitely disputed).
It turns out, as much as I really wished I could provide a list of strange connections all criminals have, or even a "recipe" for creating a certain kind of criminal, it's almost like crime is a complicated social issue that can't be understood simply by finding out who has an allergy to fish, a preference for wholemeal bread, or doesn't go to church on Sundays. So, even if it turns out that this entire list is total garbage, at least be thankful that criminals are just like any other human being: individuals.

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