Thursday 28 March 2013

Why I Hate Muslim Men

This isn't about Religion. It easily could be, but it isn't. Because I want to say that first: I don't really have a problem with Islam.
I mean, yes, it's 'wrong'; but then again every religion that relies on faith to answer the important questions is wrong. I mean, I'm an Atheist . . . but that's not the problem. Also, I have to admit that, at one point, I did hate Islam. To me it seemed oppressive, sexist, xenophobic, short-sighted and vile. But then I looked into it.
See, my father is something of an amateur religious historian. He looks up all kinds of stuff to do with Jesus' life as a human being, and the historical events that can be proven and associated with the man (whether he was God's son or not).
I'm not Christian, but I like history, and I find it fascinating. My father often talks about the disparity between scripture, meaning and reality; and he also happens to have a copy of the Qu'ran (that's how I'm choosing to spell it. It's a foreign word, so there is no 'correct' spelling, but I spell it that way because it makes sense to me).
So I actually looked up some of those pieces of 'scripture' that oppress, hate & all that other crap, and I realized something.
I don't hate Islam. I hate Muslim Men.
The Word of the Day is: 'ISLAMOPHOBIA'.
Islamophobia /'izlahməfōbeeə/ n. Hatred or fear of Muslims or of their politics or culture.
This epiphany of mine all started on the 8th of December, 2012. I can give you the exact date, because I wrote a Facebook post about it, back when I still used Facebook all the time.
It started when this man with a beard was handing out pamphlets in my local shopping centre. I must live in a cheap suburb or something, as new arrivals into Australia tend to move here so they can get on their feet; and this fellow was handing out pamphlets titled 'misconceptions about Islam'.
Now you may be reading this, knowing the premise of the post, and thinking:
  'So what? You read a pamphlet and it changed your view? Who cares?"
But that's the thing . . . I read this pamphlet, which was all about explaining how Islam wasn't sexist, and I was furious. Because that pamphlet was one of the most sexist things I had ever read. Let me reiterate what I wrote in that Facebook post, and explain what made me so mad.

See, the pamphlet was right. Despite what we're told, or lead to believe, Islamic dogma says that women ARE given the rights afforded to men about worship, property ownership and personal freedoms of speech. I find this sort of thing interesting because I did think that Islam is very oppressive towards women, and it's nice to know that I was mistaken. That's not what made me mad.
The pamplet also says the purpose of the hijab is to preserve a woman's modesty and guarantee that a woman will be judged on her words, not by her appearance. This is all fun and fascinating fact. But then it started to bother me . . . the pamphlet said:

  "The reason muslim women observe hijab is simply because Allah (God) made it a compulsory act of worship for them."

Wow! That is very interesting, and a giant load of bullshit. The Qu'ran says that a woman and men should "avert their gaze", be modest and cover their private parts. With the addition that women should cover their breasts and not flaunt their jewellery (except amongst family and close friends).
[(paraphrased) Qu'ran 'The Light' 24:31.]

So technically if you wear a shirt that isn't tight-fitting, straight leg jeans, and don't stare at people, you are being modest, and all simply because Allah wants his followers to be humble. You don't have to wear an all encompassing garb to pull that off, just don't fall victim to the sin of Pride (I may be mixing my mythologies, but this is essentially the point). The pamphlet went on to say:

The following rights [for women, are] enshrined in Islam:
  • total control of their wealth
  • choose [sic] their spouse
  • keep their own surname when married
  • own property, operate a business, study, & receive equal pay for equal work
It goes on to say they can own property and worship the same as men. And you know what? That's fine. In fact - that's better than fine. Western cultures don't offer women equal pay. And Muslim women can keep their surname, if they so choose. It just goes to show what an enlightened culture . . .
I'm sorry what? What was that? It says something down here on the pamphlet:

  "While Islam enshrines the rights of women, it also acknowledges the fact that men and women are NOT IDENTICAL. Allah says '...and the man is not like the female...' Qur'an 3:36
Islam has therefore ordained different roles for men and women to reflect this undisputed fact. Women have been granted the honour and tremendous responsibility of caring for the family and the household. While Men have been given the responsibility of providing financial support , security and . . ."


Oh, sorry, did you want to read the rest of that paragraph? Yeah, me too. But I had trouble reading the rest. It was a bit too far away to read when I threw the fucking pamphlet across the room! This just pisses me off.

You just fucking said. JUST fucking said that women have the right to work and earn money. Then you say:
  "But Islam says they have to maintain house and home!"
 I don't like it when I am lied to. I have looked through the 3:36 Qu'ran segment they speak of. That section is a sentence quoted out of context, with no relation to women's rights or responsibilities. It is the same as quoting:
  "Then God said, "Let there be light." Genesis 1:3
then claiming it is proof that Thomas Edison was a holy prophet.

I don't like it when I am lied to. But I especially can't forgive being insulted. You say one thing and try to slip a contradictory statement in there, thinking I am too stupid to realize it? Go fuck yourself.
And do you want to know the worst part?
The whole point of this pamphlet was trying to prove that the actions of a few foolish men [Islamic Terrorists] does not equate to the teachings of the prophet Muhammad.

Well, News-Flash motherfuckers:
The man who wrote this is doing the same thing that those Terrorists did. The whole point is that those terrorists were misinformed about the inherent meaning of the Qu'ran, and took it to mean:
  "Killing people I don't like = Good times in the Afterlife."
And yet you just did the same damn thing!
Nowhere. I repeat nowhere in the Qu'ran does it say that women have to maintain the home. That is something that Saudi Arabian culture and law came up with - NOT ISLAM!!

If you have any questions about the pamphlet, it provides the following information.
email: shareislam@gmail.com
phone: (+61) 3 9354-7500
site: iisna.com/pamphlets]

But I read that pamphlet months ago. So, why am I talking about it today?
Well, it's because of something I read the other day that reminded me of it.
See, I am a member of 20-Something Bloggers, and there was a forum wherein a member was complaining about people who were hating on her blog. In response to that discussion, another woman put in her two cents. Her name is 'Nagehan', and you can find her blog at nagehanbayindir.blogspot.com.au. She said:

  "At one point some religious freak got a hold of my blog's link and commented anonymously about how my marriage to my husband is a sin because he's a christian and I'm a muslim! They literally wrote a giant comment condemning our choice."

When I read that I was confused, as I was under the impression that it was a sin, according to the Qu'ran, thanks to this asshole. I was going to politely tell her as much. But to make sure I was right [Which more people on the internet need to do before commenting!] I looked up the Qu'ran online and searched for the sections about the interfaith marriage thing.
In regards to Interfaith Marriage, the Qu'ran says this:

  "And [lawful in marriage are] chaste women from among the believers and chaste women from among those who were given the Scripture before you . . ."  
Qu'ran 5:5

Translation - Men can marry Christians and Jews (that's what 'those who were given the Scripture' means), and believers.

Now that is fascinating. I mean, it's almost like it says nothing at all about women marrying Christian and Jewish Men. Some have taken that this means that they can't. But that can be proven as bullshit, because Muslim men believe they are allowed to drive cars, although The Qu'ran doesn't say they can.
Hell, if they truly believed that everything the Qu'ran doesn't say is stuff they cannot do, then they should live like the Amish, because the book was written before the discovery of electricity!

But no, this is just another example of Muslim Men extrapolating the Word of the Qu'ran to suit their own horrid, sexist wants and needs; while essentially shitting on their women, and expecting them to bow down to them while they can marry as many women as they want and beat their wives when they feel like it.

Oh sorry, I'm extrapolating myself now. See, that was my fault. I just assumed that because a society was raised on the idea that men were better than women, that it would, inevitably, lead to men beating their wives.
I should really do research on this kind of thing before I make wild, unfounded statements, (even if they're true) or I'd be just as bad as those men who say that women have to wear a hijab, or they'll burn in hell.

Islamophobia is the Word of the Day, despite me not using it much during the post itself. But that is because I used to be Islamophobic. But I'm not anymore, not really. Many people say that the suffix -phobia means 'an irrational fear'. Like how coulrophobia is an irrational fear of clowns; or nyctophobia is an irrational fear of night time or darkness. But the thing is, I don't have an irrational fear of people who follow Islam.
I have legitimate fear of Muslim Men. Because I can't tell what will make them angry at me. I'm not going to lie, of course I'm scared of them! Because they are unpredictable. Even if I read the Qu'ran cover to cover, I can't guarantee what will incite their wrath; because they aren't living their lives according to the Qu'ran, they're living it according to their interpretation of it. I can't predict what they've taken out of context or not.
I can't tell if they'll yell at me for calling them sexist; or if they'll send death threats for drawing a picture of a man with a beard; or put a bounty on my head for trying to educate people about the life of a prophet, just for taking liberties with the story (which they do all the time!). I can't tell if they'll complain when I call Muhammad a paedophile for having a sexual relationship with a nine-year old girl, despite the fact that he most certainly did, or if they'll kill hundreds of innocent people just because they're angry.

I'm scared of crazy people. I am afraid of people that threaten to kill me for practising freedom of speech. But I'm not Islamophobic.
Because in all of these riots, and all of these protests, complaints and even murders - almost everyone has a beard.
Not a single Islamic Woman is to be seen. It's not the women who are doing these horrible things. Even if they wanted to, they can't, because they're told they can't leave the home without a man (more bullshit that's not in the Qu'ran, I assume). But it's not like Muslim women do nothing . . .

On the contrary, I see Muslim women doing all kinds of things:
I see them petitioning and taking part in debate to attain more rights for women. I see them offering support to those who struggle to live as a Muslim in a mixed-faith culture. I see them working with people to achieve equity and the empowerment of Muslim women. Hell, all Muslim women seem to do is try to make life easier for them and their family. That's awesome!

Admittedly, most of this exists to counter the inherent sexism of Muslim men, but my point stands. There is nothing wrong with Islam, and so I have nothing wrong with Islam except for the fact that it's a religion, and I'm an atheist. But I have nothing wrong with the ideology, from what I've read.
The only issue are these goddamn Muslim Men, who abuse their rights, and deny the rights of women.
Sure, perhaps there are Muslim Men who don't beat their wives, or practice psychological abuse due to an adherence to an outdated culture. There may even be Muslim Men who think women are equal to or (dare I say) better than men. But they are the minority. Or at least, they aren't as loud as these terrorists who start riots over issues that don't even matter.

That is why I hate Muslim Men. Because, I am a feminist; a philosopher; a logical human being & generally a nice guy, and I fucking hate it when people lie and use religion as an excuse to do horrible things.
Now, if you are a Muslim Man, and think I am being unfair about you, or misrepresenting you, don't worry. I won't always hate Muslim Men!
As soon as you stop telling women how to dress, act and talk; stop telling them who they can marry, sleep with and talk to; stop threatening to kill people for telling the truth, expressing their opinion or criticising your culture & generally stop being mean - then I will stop hating Muslim Men.
Until then, I'm the Absurd Word Nerd, signing off.

18 comments:

  1. I like your post
    I think exactly the same as what you think
    but they are really not a worth to think.
    I have no time for thinking stupid things. Stupid people,stupid culture, stupid religion.
    Let them do that stupidity as they wish and the moslems women, I really don't care about them, cause they don't care about their rights themselves.
    so why should I care?

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    1. Thanks alot,We dont need your care.Our lord is always with us for care.You even did not visit any muslim country so how you can call us stupid?Did your religion tought you this,what you mentioned in the comment?absolutely not...........so always comment with some logically reference otherwise you do not have the right to comment.

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    2. Everyone has the right to comment in this comment section. I don't arbitrate it much, beyond removing spam or meaningless insults.
      I agree with you that it's wrong to blanketly call people stupid, though.

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  2. Absofuckinglutely

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  3. Hey Absurd Word Nerd, you should see the news of isis as on 14/12/2014.
    This would make you think of wiping out muslim men from the face of earth.

    Yours truly,
    a NAZI who hates muslims

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    1. ISIS doesn't represent Islam any more than a pancake represents the Swiss Constitution. ISIS is a cult of racists, they have more in common with a Nazi, like yourself, then they do true believers.

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  4. I am a Muslim girl by birth. I found your blog by googling "i hate muslim men". I hate a lot of them too, but your argument is kind of stretched out, and there is no reason why you should not hate on Muslim women as well, as generally they are the ones enabling the Muslim men.

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    1. Perhaps some are, but that's not my experience. Sexism isn't a one-way street, granted, but I don't think Muslim women "enabling" their victimization is the real problem. For starters, when you're the victim of abuse, be it emotional, physical or institutional, it's not easy to just "break out". There's a reason domestic violence exists, and it's because women "enable" their abusers, but it's not their fault. When you look into the disturbing statistics; threats, guilt, shame & lies are what keeps these women from acting out.
      Maybe some women are to blame and maybe I should be just as upset with them about it, but I can't bring myself to blame the victims of sexism FOR sexism.

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    2. lol, i'm a muslim girl as well, and i also found this blog by googling "i hate muslim men" (but I don't hate all to be honest, just like 95% or so and hate is probably too strong a word to describe my feelings), i liked this blog a lot, i liked the distinction between Islam and Muslim men. This blog pretty much worded my frustrations with muslim men in general, they make everything compulsory and difficult for women and everything easy for themselves. For instance my dad always goes on about how girls have to wear a hijab (I don't wear one, becoz quite frankly it cramps my style) like as soon as he sees a Mulsim women the first thing he notices and comments on is her clothing, and when i asked him why he doesn't grow a beard or dress like a muslim man he said it was only compulsory for women, my sister then jumped in and started quoting things Muhamed (pbuh) said about the way men should dress and my dad then said "well I've done my own readings, and I read that once the prophet saw a man with a grey beard and told him to dye it to make it more attractive, so that means that Islam promotes beauty, and I don't think a beard suits me, so it doesn't apply to me" You see how they make excuses for themselves! I wouldn't have cared if he didn't want to grow a beard, but it's the hypocrisy of then trying to dictate what women should wear that pisses me off. But I must say, his excuse was quite handy, I just went and told him that I found the hijab ugly therefore I must be exempt as well!

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  5. Did I mention the 'glorifying men' part? Men are so amazing! Oh, don't worry, it's a MAN~!! Your first four kids are female? The man and woman's names are forgotten. They're now Abu or Um (insert firstborn female child's name here). You gave birth to your fifth? Lovely! It's a boy? Oh, now we must call you Abu/Um (fifth born MALE baby).

    I know my classmates. I know they are children. I know sometimes they have moments of naivety, youth and innocence. And it is always shattered. Because they can only have moments. They can only have thoughts. No acting on them. I also know that all of them have insecurities. I know many of them face politics in the house and politics in the classroom. I know their only job options are 'engineer, doctor' and recently 'lawyer'. I also know many of them love football. Surprisingly, we don't have football in the curriculum. The boys' school literally down the street has an outdoors field and an indoors gymnasium and practice football. We have 'family education'. It's horrifying. It's filled with how to take care of kids, cooking, sewing, fashion and also the 101 ways your kids can die at home, in the streets, eating food, etc. It's scary. It places lots of responsibility on us. Do boys have it? My teachers guess they don't, my classmates say surely not!, and I assume they don't because the textbooks uses female pronouns while all other textbooks use male pronouns because it is always an insult to use female pronouns to a boy. 7 girls and a boy? Male plural nouns, definitely!

    Also, the isolation. I'm a girl. Since the start of the summer I haven't gone anywhere but the mall to shop for clothes. If you want to go somewhere as a girl, you must wait for your parents to feel like taking you. If you're a eight year old boy feel free to go without informing your parents to the play ground, pass by a pet store and buy a bird, pop into you're friends' houses while you're at it, and buy something from McDonald's. I can't even visit a friend's house without my parents knowing the other parents intimately.

    I loathe this. I'm always lonely. It's always boring.

    (On the bright side, most of my relatives have changed their minds on basic ideas easily. They have somewhat open minds. On lots of other stuff, they haven't. My mother, on the other hand, is an amazing feminist.)

    This is a whiny complaining comment. I'm sorry. But it felt good getting it off my chest. Lots of Muslims keep on telling me that Islam 'gave the woman her rights when all other cultures didn't' the moment I talk about women's' rights They use it to shut me up. I understand that the Quran is fantastic, but you don't follow it and you refuse to develop as a country. It's annoying. They only want to shut me up. It's like anti feminists comparing first world women to third world women. I get that Pakistan is worse. This does not mean we should stop getting better. This is not a contest of oppression.

    Cheers :).

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    1. What if all of the women disappeared from the world? What would muslim men do? Would they celabrate? Do they want us gone to have an all-male world if it were possible to reproduce without us? I wonder this.

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    2. You may call it a "whiny complaining comment", Anonymous, but I appreciate your words very much, and I agree with you.

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  6. Hi,I know Mr Matt Anderson that you would hate me and abuse me as well bcoz I am ............Muslim man.......... but i dont care.If you really want to know about the real muslim men then the real muslim men were those, who were present at the time of our beloved Prophet Muhammad (Peace be upon him) called SAHABA. Because of Sahaba, Muslim ruled the world for more than 700 Years peacefully.Why?Beacuse they followed Quran and the teaching of Holy Prophet Muhammad (P.B.U.H).
    So I am disagree with your point of view that Muslim men are sexism,terrorists and whatever etc.but Yes, I do agree with this point that nowadays muslim men, mostly they are not giving rights to muslim women and most of them just use the religion for their own mean beacuse they forgot the teaching of Quran and the way of SAHABA,...........but it doesn't mean that Muslim men deserve hate. so if you really want to know about Muslim men then read the history of Muslim men after the death of holy prophet Muhammad (P.B.U.H), who ruled the world for more than 700 Years with peace......and yes one more thing, if you dont mind search the following link in google yourself:-
    .............(Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) honored By US Supreme Court In 1935).................

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    1. How could Mohhamed have ruled the world for 700 years?? I know little about human biology but I know that we only live a little over 100 years on the absolute outside.

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    2. I don't hate and abuse persons, Mr Amin, unless I am fully aware that they personally have done something wrong. The purpose of this post was decrying an ideology that exists amongst Men who are Muslim that I have uncovered.
      After all, the post was explaining "WHY I Hate Muslim Men" not "All Muslim Men are Inherently Evil".
      Recently, I have also been made aware of how some Christians (and Hindus, although that could be more cultural than religious) also use their religion as an excuse to get away with domestic violence, rape, abuse and sexism. However, this post was made several years ago in response to the sexism I had witnessed in Muslim Men, because at the time that was the sexism that was most overt and, since Islam is a more modern religion than Christianity or Hinduism, I found the hypocrisy of the Islamic followers that much more disturbing.

      In response to the first part, well, it's an incredibly revisionist view of history. From what little I've looked up (and I need only look up little) Arabian forces - and I will give you the benefit of the doubt and accept that they were Islamic - did, in fact, rule a greater percentile of the world geography for several hundred years.
      However, firstly, I see no evidence that this lasted for 700 years. But, more importantly, there is not a single instance in history of a foreign power kindly asking to rule a country, and the domestic country kindly granting them leadership without conquest. My research shows that Islamic forces staged several international wars and conquests, killing thousands as they conquered Jerusalem and took over North Africa, India and areas of Western Europe approaching the borders of China. That's a lot of death.
      Also, your claim that this was entirely peaceful is dispited by the fact that religious inequality was rife in the empire. Although culturally they were seen as equal, Muslims were granted several privileges such as fewer taxes (sources conflict and some seem biased, but there are also claims that non-Muslims were not allowed to build structures, ride horses, bear arms or proselytize - but Muslims were). Local Christians, Jews, Hindus and Buddhists from all across this Arabic empire were treated as second-class citizens in the majority of the empire, which became exacerbated as they attempted to conquer more Christian countries.
      And your claim that this was entirely peaceful is disputed by the fact that there were no less than FOUR "Fitnas" which is an Arabic word regarding the unrest and Civil Wars that occured within this empire.

      As for the second part of your comment, saying I ought to look up the history of Muslim Men . . . first of all, I just did, but second of all, I don't care about this history. This blog post was written a few years ago, but I didn't care about the history than, I cared about the present day. I know you were trying to prove that Muslim Men are inherently peaceful, but you're wrong and you've failed miserably . . .

      However, I don't blame Muslim Men for the actions of their warmongering past, because that's the nature of conquest, it doesn't come from being Muslim, it comes from being an expanding empire. The British, the Romans, the Greeks, they all conquered and killed as part of their expanding territories. I don't hate Muslim Men because they fight wars . . . I hate them because, well, read the post above. They are sexist, they defy their own teachings and warp them for their own ends, and this ideology is so prevalent that somehow wearing a scarf is seen as synonymous with being a Muslimah, despite the fact that IT'S TOTAL BULLSHIT.

      I don't hate you, Ahmed, I just think you're wrong. You can't prove me otherwise with history, you can prove me wrong by being a good person. You appear to be doing that already, for the most part, so just keep it up.
      That's all I want.

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  7. Thank you for sharing. Reading this blog enabled me to understand what I was feeling. I was confused and thought that I might hate Islam and the qu'ran but now I see that in fact it is muslim men specifically that give me hives, not Islam. I work with a Muslim man who never greets women and let's doors slam in our face. He is a difficult person in almost every aspect but now I know for sure that it isn't his religion that is bothering me, it's him personally.
    Of course I am in the workplace so i will deal just fine. I don't like problems.

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  8. As a muslim girl, I 100% agree with you. Even though I'm only 17 years old, I've seen enough from muslim men that makes me never ever consider marrying one. They cheat, they beat their wives, they scream at them, they expect them to obey them without questioning anything - their words are like laws for the family, they can go out with friends as much as they want, but if the wife wants to do the same it's a big no or he right away suspects she's cheating, they're simply nasty human beings. I read a couple of muslim posts telling muslim women they're not allowed to marry a non-muslim - fuck off with that bullshit! I won't risk destroying my life by marrying a muslim man, especially not someone from the middle east (thank God I live in Sweden and so aren't treated like a property). They love talking about how non-muslim men can't treat a muslim woman right (they claim non-muslim men will hurt muslim women if they marry one) and that muslim women marrying non-muslim men will end up unhappy, but they really fail to see that it's the opposed. Many muslim women married to muslim men in the middle east are also afraid of speaking up against their men, out of fear of getting divorced - because a divorced woman in the middle east is viewed as trash there. It's indeed one disgusting culture that only benefit the muslim men there, and the problem is that they use islam (by manipulating it so it suits them) to make everyone believe that's the way life should look like. (now of course not ALL muslim men all like this, but shit, I've seen enough of them to really dislike muslim men)

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